Samara, The Goddess
by DarkMasterStarr
Summary: In Samara's honest opinion, being with the commander wouldn't have been bad. Not at all. However, she could not. Her own pain was with her already. Almost One-sided Shepard/Samara. Implied Shepard/Miranda.
1. Her God

Shepard was more than a simple commander.

His word was almost God's.

He was a god.

His strength, was overpowering. His sight, was overbearing. His life, was seen to be overrated.

However, when she saw the god Shepard was, she could say easily he was not that. She learned centuries ago that to judge a book by its cover is simply suicide. Shepard was wrathful in a battle, in a hunt for a kill, yet gentle and smart. He was a leader. She had wished she had his strength years ago.

When he came to her, it had been so hard to resist.

She wanted his strength, his power, his blood and his skin.

Those beautiful eyes. She had never dreamed in years that one so young could touch her. She told him he must not give into temptation.

She was as well say this to herself.

As she tried pushing him away, she joined her hands with him.

As she tried to avoid his eyes, she stood and looked at his stormy blue.

As she heard his simple, but powerful words, the words of a god, she wanted to become a goddess at that point. Yes, yes she could find happiness with him...

_'No.'_

"In... another time." She told young Shepard, locking him away with her own power. His breath was on her purple lips. She could taste him and it tasted good, cool, relaxing. But her own pains stopped her from reaching her lips. Shepard could have any other woman and they would fall for his charms. She had fallen long ago.

But her pain resonated more.

So she walked away, away from the Starboard Observation deck, and imagined his kiss, never looking back to see his hurt eyes.

In another time, another space, she was Samara, the goddess, and she was his.

_**End.**_

**_A/N: I always wondered how Samara felt when Shepard tries starting a romance with her. And yes, to me, it seemed she wanted it, especially when she almost gave into temptations. To me, the only way she could have stop it was because she had pains in the past she cannot deal with as of yet. She's afraid of losing another. She has lost the daughter she has admired, maybe the lover she has lost, making her follow an ancient Code, even though the Code doesn't permit her from love. She doesn't want to fall in love again... but too bad, cause she is. Hehehe. I always wanted to do this. I hope you guys enjoyed._**


	2. His Goddess

She watched him as he stood.

A gun was his god sword.

The last stray bullet hitting the monstrosity known as a "Reaper". It curled and breathed fire as it shook. It collapsed under its own pain and fell into the platform the three of them were.

Samara felt herself falling. Shepard made sure he caught her hand. Were they going to die, she did not know.

Was it gonna to end with this platform falling upon them?

She did not know.

She gasped as she breathed air again. She felt Shepard dig her out. She stared at him with amazement. Her god has saved her again.

Shepard dug out Miranda as she shook of her own pain. She was alive, wasn't she? Samara saw she stared also at her god as Shepard told them to move quick so they could get back to the ship in one piece.

Samara resisted the urge to kiss Shepard and taste his power. They had won, they had survived, they had lived, even when things looked grim and bloody.

Within 10 minutes, the base exploded and Shepard's Normandy was away from the blast. Samara stood there, as her god once again saved them all.

And again she resisted the urge to kiss him. To hold him. To bed him. To hug him even. To feel her own hourglass hips on his own perfect ones.

Those urges were greater than before.

She watched as Shepard was approached by Miranda again. She was more willing to do so, to do the things Samara wished to do. Samara wished she had more power to take her god instead of watching afar.

But it was the most safest.

The Code taught her that pain wasn't suffering. Suffering was optional.

She chose suffering to stow away her own pain.

_**End.**_

_****__A/N: I think I'm going to leave it like this. If not, I'll do one more chapter. I SOOO want a Shep-Samara romance in Mass Effect 3. Definitely. I'm hoping they do it._

_****__In any case, hope you enjoyed this. _


	3. Only In Her Dreams

"Shepard..."

"Samara?" He had been surprised she had personally sat foot in his cabin. "Why are you here?"

"I..." She was not so sure herself. She tried doing her best doing a shrug, although it more so came off more awkwardly. "I... want to see you."

"See me?" He honestly was shocked, as she could see his eyes blue, sparking with surprise. However, a twinkle of hope sprung up. His face betrayed his eyes, as a kind, and formal smile came up. "Well, what can I do for you?"

"I have been pondering, thinking about what you said last to me..."

"That so?" Shepard's voice did not waver.

"And I would be lying if I did not feel anything for it."

Shepard did not speak, only keeping his polite smile up. Samara smiled a little, "Forgive an old warrior like me. I am a monument of sorrow and regret. To reach out to something that was reaching out to me would be hard."

She inched close, as her light blue eyes didn't leave his maelstrom blue. He stayed, stagnant but strong like a rock. "But I am now reaching out for it."

"Are you saying..."

"Shepard," She went back to the place she started at, "I know how you feel about Miranda."

"Miranda? Lawson?" He blinked. "What about her?"

"Surely you don't-"

"No, I don't. My eyes were reserved for another."

"Shepard. John-"

"You're the only one who has called me by my real name before." He smiled. He took her gloved hand with his own naked hand. "Samara. I told you before: you have been strong for so long. Share my strength with yours."

She smiled again, "Maybe I need this."

She went back to the spot where she could feel his power, and then reach more, as she could taste his lips again, as his slow, melodic breath was upon her own blue face. She could see everything. Feel everything. This was how it was in the present of a god? She felt the power coursing through her veins now. She was powerful, warm. At home.

Now, to seize the prize, she would have to seal it, with her lips. And so her purple thin lips reached his peach full lips.

A kiss that was powerful. It was like the rush of her biotics flowing through her, matched by his own soldier strength. Her biotic cloak cloaked him and the kiss became ten-times even more intense. He gasped at the goddess strength.

"Wow." Shepard could say, in between gasps. He could still feel her on his lips, as could she. She smiled, gasping herself.

"John... Take me."

Shepard did just that. His smile was almost sad. Playfully, he tossed her to the bed. Gently, he jumped on her, and kissed. Samara would be appointed to the seat of the gods and goddesses.

Samara smiled sadly, as she realized finally the white dyed from her eyes. She stood and looked out into the black window. She was still at the Starboard Observation deck, lost only in her meditations. So, this was how she would have him? Meditations and such? She dreamt he took the aging warrior, bedded her and grounded his hips into her. He has said he was curious about Asari physiology and she was curious about Human physiology. They had been more similar than she had thought before. Her blue skin was upon his apricot. And she was finally Samara, The Goddess.

She dreamt of hitting one thousand after her god died, grown and full children of belly. She dreamt of her children not a single defect she had in her first three. She dreamt they heard stories, lore of how she and their father, her husband, took on the universe's biggest threat – the Reapers – and defeated them soundly. And she smiled everyday. Shepard was her god, their god, humanity's god and the universe's god and she was happy everyday.

In reality, she could hear Miranda's laughter and posh jokes to the commander. She could see Miranda look at the commander with interest and a cue ball of love in those blue eyes she wished were hers. She had wished she was more lighthearted, warm instead of cold and old. Miranda was young, a biotic queen herself. She was Samara's younger self. She wasn't afraid. She was as much as a leader as Shepard than the Asari matriarch justicar. By the Code, she would serve him though. As a Olympic servant to her Zeus and her Hera.

She would be Hera in her meditations.

So she meditated a lot more than before.

_"In another time, in another life."_

_**End.**_

A/N: Okay, had to do one more chapter after the last one. I thought it was just too lacking. In any case, yes, poor Samara's love will be unrequited only because of her own desire and need not to feel more heartbreak. With losing a child, by her hand, by probably losing more before, she is a sad broken warrior that Shepard could not help. And because of that, Miranda saw her chance. Samara will forever remain in her meditations, dreaming to touch her god. A sad ending for a sadder story.

Hope you guys enjoyed! =D


	4. You Aren't Old

Desire was a powerful thing. A sin if one let it.

Samara knew it was. Desire never truly tired, even if one was tired themselves, so as long they wanted person.

She want to feel his skin against hers. Her smooth line of purple lips against his full, peach lips. She wanted to run her hands against his powerful arms, his strong jaw, and against his rock-hard abs.

She could live in her meditations, dreaming and singing in pleasure in her meditations.

However, lately, she no longer could do it.

She hungered, crying out as her fingers reached her lower regions, crying for his name out loud, instead of the dreams. It's been a while she hungered like this. It was almost... obscene. It was obscene. How, how did it get like this?

Was she... why?

She... _needed _him.

Oh why, why did he come to her cabin? He did not even know what he wrought, did he? No, he did not. He truly did not.

Yet, she wanted to show him what he did.

"Mmm." She shivered, releasing her hold against her body. That was... powerful. It's been a while such an itch like that came. More of a while since she actually wanted to do... that. She truly had thought she was near the wall where she was starting to descend to eternal sleep, that those urges died the day her former lover left her, and her children were named "Demons".

Yet, Commander John Shepard had awoken this feeling again, by just an "almost-kiss", almost three weeks ago.

Things cooled down after they defeated the Collectors, and their Human-Reaper...

No, she lied.

Kasumi Goto had joined, as Shepard helped her reclaimed painful memories, pain that Samara never felt but knew. Then, over at Aite, they dealt with the tragedy story of one man being abused by the very people they formerly worked with, something that made her glad Shepard made the choice to destroy the base. He then met with the Reaper behind the Collectors and all this madness and a foreboding warning was sent out to them. Finally, she had personally met the woman Shepard was friends with for years. Another Asari who was in love with Shepard.

Her god. Oh her god, how many loved you?

All that, all those extra adventures, they had made her hunger for him more. And each of them, she was right on the mission. Did he want to torture her for rejecting him, or did he believe this, only this, was anytime for them to be in each others presence? She could barely take it. She couldn't.

He truly was almost punishing her.

One more mission, one more and she would just – jump up and kiss him, damn the company. Even if Miranda or Tali – both women who wanted Shepard as badly as her probably – were there, she would just do it.

Desire truly was a sin.

She could not just go to him, and go slam her lips against his now. She was truly... afraid. What if he moved on? What if he didn't want her now? Miranda was bold, Tali was as well, if prodded. She was not. Who was to say maybe Liara would have another chance? They did go to his cabin, for drinks. Liara left with a smile, Shepard was also happy.

Was she even jealous? She feared losing him, but she wasn't even with him.

This was truly bad.

So what could she do?

Maybe she should just go. Maybe she just should go. She wanted him. She needed him.

She needed to be his goddess.

* * *

"Shepard..." She released that breath she sucked in.

"Samara?" John Shepard looked away from his datapad, and set it down on his counter. "Wait, you're here?"

She just nodded, looking around at his room. Her eyes were mystical, sparkling in wonder and nostalgia. _'This is not unlike my meditations. The counter, the glass where Shepard places his model ships – such many ships lie in that glass.' _A mystical smile whisked on her lips. The little things Shepard had, made him both a person and a god. _'Everything is here. Everything. Not a single thing misplaced, or out. Even the air itself, strong with his scent.'_

John Shepard did not say much, watching her circle the room and slowly make herself to him. She noticed that same formal smile on his face. "I'm guessing you're just here to see me."

She hummed and nodded, her eyes never leaving his. She saw the almost uncomfortable look rise on his face, as she stood near him. Did he want to reach for her, or leave her like she did to him on the Starboard Observation Deck?

She knew his smile. He was confused, cautious, not unlike an animal. "Well, here I am. Anything you need?"

"No." She quaintly said.

"No?" Shepard's eyebrow rose slightly, but it relaxed as a smile still kept on his features. "Just taking a tour around the ship huh?"

She chuckled, smiling at him. "You can say that..."

"Oh? Any other reason you came here?" Shepard asked, curious.

"Yes, there is." She bit her lip. "But I don't know how to say it."

"I'm all ears. You can say whatever you like, Samara. Maybe it's a personal issue? Do you have a problem with your quarters?"

She blinked. He actually thought that was the reason she was here, or was he just making conversation, waiting for her to make the first move? The second one was the one she both liked to believe and didn't. "The current quarters I dwell at suffice."

"Ah. I don't suppose you're here to make complaints about people you don't like here. Joker was going through that faze the first two months in this operation." Shepard cracked a joke, smirking as he moved for his bed. "Unless you're that type."

"No, Shepard." She also chuckled. As he sat, she still stood. She would wait.

"I guess you're just here to see how I'm doing. Not a lot of people do that. I'm the one usually moving around, going up and down a level or two to go visit people. Always nice to see you aren't forgotten." His smile was more friendlier than before, the jokes seemed to ease the tension between them too.

"I believe a change was to be in order." She nodded. She also knew of the commander's many walks around the ship, much more than any crew member. He was always on the move, always interacting with people and never stopping. A great marking of a leader, who cared for everyone on this ship. Even she.

"Great to hear. Well, you're welcome to stay in my place for a while. I'm not journeying around the ship anytime soon so, how about we talk?" Shepard grinned. He jumped out his bed and went to the couch. Two glasses laid there, washed and dried. They most likely were the ones Liara and John shared together. "You like wine?"

She shook her head. "You forget my Code, Shepard."

"No, I didn't. I just didn't know you can't consume alcohol." Her god said. He shrugged and grinned lopsidedly. "Eh, I need to stay off the stuff myself. Nobody likes a drunkard of a commander. Heh."

She smiled. Her smile was almost as guilty as his shrug. "I admit, perhaps that is... one of the only worldly possessions I miss sometimes."

"Wine, right? It was the good kind. Not too strong, but just... there, ya know?" He laughed. "Totally respect your Code, but sometimes I need this."

"It is a... stressful job constantly reassuring the crew, isn't it?" Samara sat gently on the leathery couch of Shepard's room. She was near the spot he took her in her dreams. She almost blushed.

"Unlike any other." He simply said, closing the raspberry-grape wine bottle. He put his arms on the head of the couch and leaned his head back, sighing in relaxation. "Sometimes, I think it was better just being 'Commander' under a captain, or just being a regular crew member. And then Saren comes along, and things change. Sometimes I like being 'Commander Shepard Of The Starship Normandy' or 'Commander Shepard, Once Dead But Back' but most of it is just truly stressful."

"I cannot fathom what that feels like."

"Heh, I suppose you can't." Shepard grinned at her. "But I'm glad you aren't feeling that." He was truly relaxed this time, the small talk helping them, despite just admitting some of his frustrations to her. "You been good these past days? I never really had the chance to go see you down at the observation deck."

She knew he didn't want to see her. He was afraid she would say something. She wanted him to though. She wished he did. He probably would never have seen her. Maybe he would to, to give a prep talk or something small like that but nothing like how they were before. He would spend hours just talking to her in her cabinet and she almost let that go weeks ago. She almost let him go.

"I have. Though, I admit, I miss... our talks." She kept her eyes on his face. He turned his head from the ceiling he was staring at, and looked back into her eyes. Stormy blue versus light sky blue. By the goddess, she loved his eyes. She quickly looked away. The itch came again, making her want to do such... obscene things with her body.

"...I miss them too." He said lowly. That was it. She missed him and he missed her. They never needed to come out and say it. They missed each other.

"You should come more to my quarters, Shepard. Not only to talk about our next operations..." She boldly said. He didn't want to show it, but he looked actually surprised. She didn't even know what she meant herself. Those two sentences were ambiguous, waiting to be filled, and... inviting.

"Maybe I should." He said back. He accepted.

"Yes..." She inched slowly to him. "That would be nice."

He stood, stagnant but strong like a rock. He did not inch forth, he did not move. He waited. Like thunder in the clouds.

She came in his face, and planted a kiss...

Near the lips.

_'Almost, but not quite.'_

Without warning, Samara stood and move to the steps. She could feel her god looking at her back, wondering, pondering. She wondered if she hurt him even more that before. That was... Too much like an "almost". She heard him stand and walk near her. "Samara?"

She was happy and sad at the same time. He wanted her, she let him know she wanted him too, but she still was afraid. She smiled gently. "Forgive me, John. I am a monument of sorrow and regret. An old broken warrior-"

"You aren't _old_." He reassured her. That commander of hers, always making sure someone feels less bad. That brought up a broken smile on her face, at least for a few quick seconds.

"To you, John. In reality, I am nearing on 920. In a few ten years, I will be simply be that – an old asari trying to reach out to a young one. You have your whole life, your career. Do you really want to be with an old-"

Then he made the first move, and kissed her gently on her lips. She did not resist. She did not this time. Her cloak of biotics were not reaching to get him out, or even pull him closer. She did so with her own arms, holding his neck, as if her whole life force was poured in that kiss. She never, at that moment, wanted him to let go. She never wanted to not be with him. She wanted to be his goddess...

However, she felt him go away and she nearly cried out. She kept her tongue and let him speak. He let go, staring in her eyes.

"You aren't old."

_**End.**_

A/N: Alright, alright! The story couldn't end there, it couldn't! I couldn't allow it. Yes, Shepard gets his Hera. He gets her finally. And Samara gets her Zeus. Granted Zeus cheats horribly on Hera but this isn't the case. Anyway, I read the last chapters of this story and I was like, "Damn! I gotta do something with this! I can't just leave it like this!" so one more chapter. And who knows? Might even do an epilogue, though I think this a really happier ending for this story.

I was thinking a steamier, more sexier scene but that probably would have ruined the fic. Maybe a sequel oneshot of this will be made to make that scene come to life. This fic I totally loved doing and thanks to the few who also liked this fic. Until then, I think I should work on my other stories and hold my tongue anymore. Haha, anyway, later guys and thanks.


End file.
